55. I am DONE!

I am tired.
Tired in a way that lives in my bones,
in my breath,
in the thoughts that barely hold me together.
Tired in a way that makes every morning feel like a battle
before I even open my eyes.

And I am done.

Done pretending I’m fine.
Done carrying everything alone.
Done surviving a life that does not feel like mine.

There is a scream inside me—
one I’ve silenced for years.
I’ve buried it under responsibility,
under loyalty,
under the belief that I “shouldn’t complain,”
because someone always has it worse.

But no.

Today I need to say it clearly:

I DON’T WANT THIS LIFE.
Not like this.
Not in this shape.
Not in this crushing exhaustion that is slowly eating me alive.

I want out.
Out of the tiredness that cages me.
Out of the patterns that choke me.
Out of the expectations that break my spine every single day.

I want air.
I want space.
I want a life that doesn’t require me to disappear in order to function.

And yes — I am scared.
And yes — I am breaking.
But I need change like I need oxygen.
So desperately that it burns inside me.

I need something that doesn’t suffocate me.
Something that doesn’t demand my entire soul
in exchange for just a little peace.
Something that lets me breathe without apologizing.

So let me say it out loud:

I am tired.
I am at my limit.
And I am ready — fiercely, painfully ready —
for a life that doesn’t hurt.

Because I can’t keep going like this.
I cannot pretend I don’t feel the collapse inside my chest.
I cannot keep shrinking to fit into a world
that has never once tried to fit me back.

I am done.

But in this brutal honesty—
in this moment where everything cracks open—
there is one trembling thread of hope:

If I can finally say “I am done,”
then maybe — just maybe —
I am finally ready to begin.